Ways of Life: A veteran reporter who was 'a collector of people'
Also remembered: Storied director of the Charlotte Ballet; minister at Myers Park UMC; beloved elementary school and dance teacher; owner of a women's dress shop; a groundbreaking neurosurgeon
You’re reading Ways of Life, a weekly obituaries newsletter from The Charlotte Ledger honoring our friends, neighbors and family members who made an impact on Charlotte through the ways they lived their lives.
Today’s Ways of Life is sponsored by Caregiving Corner:
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Joe DePriest was a storyteller who lit up North Carolina newsrooms and the lives of the people around him
Joe DePriest was a newspaperman whose warmth and curiosity about people made him a great journalist and a treasured friend to many. He spent his entire career at The Shelby Star and The Charlotte Observer. (Photos courtesy of the family)
by Ken Garfield
I knew that Joe DePriest was going to be a forever friend the evening we met in 1980.
I had been hired by The Shelby (N.C.) Star and the newsroom staff hosted a party welcoming me to town. Joe, a reporter at The Star, introduced himself with a smile and handshake and proceeded to ask me about me. His warmth and curiosity — and his uniqueness, as you are about to learn — lit up the room. As I came to learn, they lit up the life of any person blessed to know him.
That was Joe then, and that was Joe for the 45 years we remained friends. He died from cancer and pneumonia on April 30 at 81. He was at home in Cramerton, pulling visitors close to him near the end for a final kiss on the cheek.
Joe spent his entire newspaper career as a reporter with The Shelby Star and The Charlotte Observer. He grew up in Shelby. He lived later in Belmont and then Cramerton. He spent seven years caring for his wife, Jan. After a seven-year journey with Alzheimer’s, she died last October at 80. Two months later, Joe was diagnosed with cancer.
I invite you to read Joe’s complete obituary at www.cecilmburtonfuneralhome.com.
Consider what follows here a joyful lament from his friends.
Books, Barbecue and Sundrop
Dick Hamrick and Joe were best friends since first grade at Marion School in Shelby. “Brothers from another mother,” Dick, 81, liked to say. They’d walk home from school and Joe would stop at the library to check out books. Just before Joe died, the two friends recalled those days. Dick asked Joe if he remembered his library card number. Joe did. “It was 5-4 something,” Dick said.
Joe turned Dick onto Bob Dylan and Johnny Cash. They ran together for years before slowing to a walk. Alston Bridges Barbecue was their lunchtime haunt. They ordered Sun Drop because that’s what they drank growing up.
At the memory, Dick said, “I’m trying to make myself smile.”
A Collector of People
This is in the obituary, but it’s worth repeating. Brenda Bouser, Joe’s colleague at The Star, recalled some of Joe’s best work. It includes a special section marking the 40th anniversary of the end of World War II. He interviewed dozens of veterans for that, drawing out their memories with his gift for making an instant connection. Brenda called him “a collector of people.” That extended to the “stars” of the Cleveland County Fair, about whom he wrote annually. He was crestfallen to learn that the Bearded Lady, who died during an appearance at the fair, was, in fact, a man.
Joe DePriest was a master at conducting interviews that drew out not only information, but also emotion. Throughout his career, he served as a mentor to younger journalists about how to report with authority and integrity.
‘We’re Sending DePriest, Right?’
Joe spent 25 years with The Star, then left for The Charlotte Observer, working in its Gastonia bureau for 20 years until he retired. Roland Wilkerson, an editor in the bureau, said Joe’s prenatural calm stood out in a business populated by Type-A journalists who could be “difficult.” (That’s Roland’s word, my dear former colleagues, not mine.) Joe was even-keeled. Wonder how he became the go-to reporter on the story of the disappearance of 9-year-old Asha Degree from her rural Cleveland County home in 2000? Editors in Charlotte would call the Gastonia bureau and ask, “We’re sending DePriest, right?”
The Lunch Bunch
How could you not embrace a guy who loved to eat.
Young reporters in Gastonia often got to work around 10 a.m., the crack of dawn to 20-somethings. They’d arrive to find Joe, there at the crack of dawn for real, wondering if it was time for lunch. Linwood Produce in Kings Mountain was a favorite.
Jeff Diamant, Joe’s colleague in Gastonia, recalls lunch at the Shrimp Boat.
“I was in my mid-20s,” Jeff said, “and I'd be telling him my problems and he’d say something like, ‘Jeff, one day 25 years from now you won’t remember any of the things you’re upset about now. You won’t remember this period of your life at all, or even me.’ Looking back, I know he was trying to make me feel better. But I’m glad to say he was wrong. My friendship with him was something I’ve treasured all these years.”
Joe was a member of The Lunch Bunch, old-timers who meet at The Hub in Shelby. After cancer took hold, the best he could do was a few bites of corn. Joe’s caregiver and friend, Betsy Gaston Haughton, would accompany him. They’d listen to the Bee Gees on the 30-minute drive down I-85.
For 20 Christmas seasons, Joe, Jan, my wife, Sharon, and I would enjoy a fancy meal together. At what turned out to be our final Christmas dinner together, Sharon and I could see that something wasn’t right with Jan. Years later, I remember meeting Joe and Jan for lunch at the Old Stone Steakhouse in Belmont. I remember how tenderly he cut her hamburger.
He Sang Jan Awake
Julie Mills Perry is grateful for the love that Joe shared with her mother, Jan, and the care he gave after Jan was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. “One of the sweetest things Joe did with mom was his morning ritual of singing her awake and helping her wake up and get moving with a series of little exercises they did together,” Perry said. “They also had favorite songs that they sang together, ‘Carolina in the Morning’ and ‘Fly Me to the Moon.’ They will be singing together in heaven.”
Joe’s love for his wife, Jan, shined through as he cared tenderly for her during her 7-year battle with Alzheimer’s.
‘How Was Your Day?’
One last thing.
For years, Joe took pictures — walking the greenway, Jan smiling, visits from his stepchildren, Julie and Freddie, and their families, you name it. If you met Joe and/or Jan for lunch, you had your picture taken by the waiter or waitress. He would text these pictures to friends. It was his way of staying connected, especially after Jan’s illness kept him close to home.
Nearly every day I’d get a text with a photo attached. Each one came with a question: “How was your day?”
I’d text back, “We’re good, Joe. Hope y’all are, too.”
Reach freelance writer/editor Ken Garfield at garfieldken3129@gmail.com.
Today’s supporting sponsor is Crisis Assistance Ministry, which provides assistance and advocacy for people in financial crisis, helping them move toward self-sufficiency by providing emergency rent and utility assistance as well as basic necessities.
Other obituaries this week:
Terry Lee Deason Abee, 73, of Harrisburg started her career with the Charlotte division of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Terry became a member of Northside Baptist Church when her family moved to Charlotte. She graduated from Garinger High School and attended Cochran Junior High. Terry sang for about five years in the late 1990s with the Queen Charlotte Sweet Adelines Chorus.
Jean-Pierre Bonnefoux, 82, of Charlotte moved here in 1996 to lead the Charlotte Ballet, which he did for 20 years, growing it into the region’s preeminent dance organization. His choreographic repertoire for the Charlotte Ballet included “Carmina Burana,” “Sleeping Beauty,” “Cinderella,” “Peter Pan,” “Romeo & Juliet,” “Shindig” and the ballet he may be best remembered for, the holiday classic, “Nutcracker.” In 2010, Charlotte Ballet’s home on North Tryon Street, the Patricia McBride and Jean-Pierre Bonnefoux Center for Dance, was built and named to honor him and his wife of more than 45 years, Patricia McBride.
Rev. Erman Franklin Bradley, 95, of Charlotte was a member of Myers Park United Methodist Church in Charlotte, where he served as the minister of pastoral care and counseling from 1965 to 1975. Later in his life he taught Sunday school at Myers Park UMC and also delivered communion. He was a talented musician and wrote thousands of poems in his lifetime. Erman also enjoyed reading books, gardening, watercolor painting, wood and stone carving and studying nutrition.
Georgia Griffin Browning, 74, of Charlotte was a member of Providence Baptist Church for over 45 years, where she served as a Sunday school teacher, afterschool tutor and bereavement committee member. Always an avid reader, literature was very important to Georgia. In addition to being a teacher, she worked for over a decade as a children’s book buyer for Bedford Falls in Park Road Shopping Center. Her artistic nature manifested in a love of gardening, baking, fashion, interiors and antiques.
Dorothy Ann Carbone, 94, of Charlotte retired from the Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools system and later went to work as a biscuit maker at Hardee’s to help put her children through college. Dorothy volunteered with Meals on Wheels and Friendship Trays. She also sewed gowns for preemie babies in the NICU. Dorothy traveled extensively after retirement.
Thomas Sanders Carpenter, 94, of Charlotte worked at Aetna, assuming the position of general manager of the Charlotte field office in 1968. He received numerous honors and awards, but his favorites were the Lifetime Achievement Award in 2002 and the 1974 National Industrial Softball Championship, won by Aetna’s Charlotte office team that he managed at the end of his playing career. Tom was a member of the Quail Hollow Club for nearly 60 years.
Anthoula Markos Copsis, 89, of Charlotte spent many years working at the family’s South 21 Restaurant in Charlotte. She demonstrated her love to those who visited her house through her cooking and her Greek pastries.
Maronica Goodwin, 56, of Charlotte graduated from West Mecklenburg High School. After graduation, she worked for several companies in the Charlotte area with the last company being Solventum Corp.
Rhonda “Rhonj” Carol Griffin, 70, of Cape Coral, Fla., earned a degree in elementary education from UNC Charlotte, leading to a 32-year career as an elementary school teacher and as a devoted dance teacher at Miss Donna’s School of Dance in Charlotte. She was a member of Elevation Church and found joy in life’s simple pleasures — especially going on a cruise or relaxing at the beach. A lifelong sports enthusiast, Rhonda never missed a chance to cheer for her favorite teams, including the Duke Blue Devils and the Carolina Panthers.
Vanessa Jane Robertson Johnson, 70, of Charlotte worked as an assistant teacher in Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools and as a youth leader for multiple area churches. She was an avid reader, music lover and television enthusiast.
Vickie Knight Kabisch, 77, of Charlotte was a member of the Central Church of God in Charlotte. Vickie was an avid Panthers fan and watched every game.
Sharon Busby Lanier, 60, of Charlotte moved back to Charlotte in 1989, where she continued her career in the animal field and became a registered medical assistant. Sharon recently worked at Hickory Grove Animal Hospital in Charlotte. She loved the beach, fishing, dancing, live music and concerts, watching the Florida Gators and attending Carolina Panthers games.
Carrol Louise “Duty” McIntire, 91, of Charlotte opened a small women’s dress shop named The Boutique in Pineville. Over the next 25 years, the store relocated to Carmel Commons and later the Arboretum shopping center in South Charlotte. Carrol introduced Charlotte women to many outstanding fashion makers and limited inventory purchases so that no Charlotte woman ever arrived at a dinner party to find herself wearing the exact dress as the hostess. Carrol enjoyed travel and covered the globe, taking countless trips around the world and to its far reaches in search of discovery and knowledge.
Elizabeth Ann Potter Merrell, 80, settled in Charlotte and pursued a career in computer programming, first at IBM and later for the Miller Clinic, Arnold Palmer Cadillac and the YMCA. She enjoyed travelling in the U.S. and abroad, hiking and annual beach trips.
Dajah Symone Oglesby, 26, of Charlotte graduated from West Charlotte High School. She was an avid athlete who showcased her true talents on the basketball court. She was an active member of The Greater Fellowship Missionary Baptist Church where she attended Sunday school and Bible study. Dajah participated with the youth and young adult choir, the youth and younger adult usher board, youth ministry, the culinary team and the liturgical dance team. She died after a lengthy bout with juvenile diabetes and other complications.
Dr. Jerry Miller Petty, 89, of Charlotte moved to Charlotte in 1968, where he joined what would become Carolina Neurosurgery and Spine Associates. Over the decades, he led efforts to bring groundbreaking technology like CT imaging to local hospitals and he was instrumental in building what is now the largest neurosurgical practice in the United States. Beyond the operating room, Dr. Petty was a passionate athlete and advocate for health in sports. He completed 23 marathons and served for decades as a neurological consultant to NASCAR and the Carolina Panthers, helping shape concussion protocols and athlete safety.
Nina Jo Malcom Honeycutt Tarlton, 80, of Matthews pursued a career in banking and retired from First Citizens Bank after 27 loyal years. Nina enjoyed camping, crafting and watching John Wayne and all her favorite cowboy movies.
Sheldon Wells Turner, 40, of Charlotte was a vice president with the Wells Fargo corporate & investment banking operations group. Sheldon was an avid reader and enjoyed exploring the outdoors, volunteering, traveling and music.
Ways of Life condensed obituaries are compiled by Darrell Horwitz.
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Ways of Life editor: Craig Paddock