Wisdom from Mom
Plus: New Charlotte-themed crossword, and the news of the week: Assessing fallout of possible Roe reversal; City budget raises parking, utility costs; Tepper Sports CEO departs; Queens joins D1 sports
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40 Over 40 winners share their moms’ most memorable advice
Wise moms and their grateful children. (Clockwise from top left): Mo Pandoria and his mom, Meena Pandoria; Tonya Jameson and her mom, Carolyn; Banu Valladeres (at around age 3) and her mom, Betty Valladares; Ross Danis and his mom, Marlene Danis; Rob Harrington and his mom, Miriam Hart Harrington
by Cristina Bolling
For most of us, our moms were our first teachers, our first counselors and our first role models — whether we chose to take their heed or not.
So in honor of Mother’s Day, we asked a handful of our wise Charlotte Ledger 40 Over 40 winners from the past three years to share the best advice they remember from mom. (The winners are all leaders in our community, so their mothers must have had something to do with their achievements, right?)
Enjoy the wisdom. And if you’d like to share a piece of stellar advice from your own mom, send a few sentences along. We’ll publish them in a future edition of The Ledger.
Don’t worry — trust your intuition
Banu Valladares, executive director of Charlotte Bilingual Preschool
As a child, I was very active with a full imagination and bursting with energy. I was athletic, curious and talkative. Mom was a teacher, and she set up our house rules as she would her classroom’s: with naturally high expectations and little judgment. She created a safe space for me to explore and be me.
My son is a very quiet and thoughtful human being and, because he is so different from me, I spent a good portion of his childhood worrying about his social life. Mom’s best advice: “Do not worry. Things will be as they will be. Trust your intuition. You will know when to worry. This is not the time or reason.” And she was right — she very often is.
Keep your head up … and get a haircut
Ross Danis, president and CEO of MeckEd
Once, during my one year on my high school football team, I caught the ball but ran the wrong way. Later that day, I overheard my mom, Marlene Danis, telling a group of friends that anyone could have run toward the goal line, but that I was an “out of the box” thinker and very creative. I was the oldest of four and her only son.
Growing up, I remember her telling me to keep my head up and smile, no matter how bad things might seem. She passed away at 56 after battling lung cancer for 18 months. By that time, I was a school principal and was comfortable speaking in front of people. She asked me to emcee her funeral, to make sure that she looked good and to write and read her eulogy to her before she passed. I did. That was 28 years ago, and I still miss her every day. Her last words to me? “Get a haircut.”
Do your best, treat others with respect, love your family
Rob Harrington, attorney with Robinson Bradshaw and civic leader
My mother, Miriam Hart Harrington, was a towering figure in my life and the lives of my four siblings. Standing just over 4’10”, she made her presence and her indomitable will known to all around her. She was born in Florence, S.C., in 1919 (the midst of our last great pandemic). She and my father were married for nearly 45 years, before his passing in 1988.
Mom’s advice was simple. As Black children growing up in Florence, she taught us to follow her path to college, and for each of us, beyond. She convinced us that only our best was ever good enough. Academic achievement and personal integrity were expected — in fact, required. And backing down from challenge was never an option. She marched us into segregated accommodations (in my case recently “integrated” accommodations) with the simple demand that we be treated equally and the requirement that we know we belonged.
Her other admonitions were equally clear and simple: Treat everyone around you with respect. Leave each place you visit a little better than you found it. Love your family. And, of course (repeatedly), “Honor your father and your mother so that your days may be long upon the land. …” We did. And we miss her. Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms!
It’s OK to be afraid … and ask for help when you need it
Tonya Jameson, senior manager of policy and community advocacy at Leading on Opportunity
The most memorable piece of advice that my mother shared was actually directed to my baby brother. Every day before he went to school, she told him to make good choices. By the time he was old enough to understand that advice, I had one foot out of the door ready for college. That piece of advice still resonates with me. Years later, my brother told her that those three words rang in his head every day through grade school.
The strongest piece of advice that I received from my mother was by watching how she lived. She had the determination to push through fear, whether it was going back into the classroom after being a stay-at-home mom or taking the leap from science teacher to acting middle school assistant principal despite her fear that she wasn’t qualified. And on paper, she wasn’t qualified. She needed to complete a master’s degree to move beyond being a substitute principal. She didn’t think she could do it. She was wrong.
Mom balanced getting her master’s degree, raising three children and learning how to be a middle school principal. We all pitched in — my brothers, dad and I — to help her achieve the credentialing required to change her title from acting to simply assistant principal. Instead of caving to her fear or crumbling under the stress, she reached out to all of us for help, from proofreading papers to typing essays on an old-school Brother typewriter. So, I’d say, the best piece of advice that Mom gave us was showing us that it’s OK to be afraid, and more importantly to ask for help when you need it.
Don’t be afraid of hard work
Mo Pandoria, founder and CEO of IDOLIZE Brows and Beauty
My mother’s strongest advice came more from her actions and less from her words. She is the hardest working woman I know, and her roles of running a business with my dad, being accountable for all the bills and accounting, cooking and cleaning every single day, and taking care of three naughty kids was no doubt a challenge, yet she did it with no complaints.
In our native language, Gujarati, she would always tell us, “Don’t be afraid of work.” When she would say this, I thought in my early years that she was just calling me lazy, but realistically it was the best advice my mom could give us. Work hard and it will pay off!
I’m blessed for having a wonderful, loving, hardworking mom. She set the path for my success, and her advice will always be passed down. Happy Mother’s Day, Mom! I love you!
Teach people how to treat you
Ashley Pharr-Godbee, program director for Thompson Child and Family Focus
My mother is a wise woman with lots of great advice. But one that sticks out the most for me is the time she told me, “Don’t wait too long to teach people how to treat you.” I took this to mean that what you permit, you promote.
That has been a game-changer in my life, both personally and professionally. It gave me the confidence to speak up for myself in times when I needed to the most.
Today’s supporting sponsor is Soni Brendle:
What time is it? Time for a new Charlotte-themed crossword
This week’s is called “MLS in Charlotte: A Frantic Frolic.”
Ledger crosswords are created by Chris King, edited by Tim Whitmire and presented by CXN Advisory. Enjoy!
.PDF (suitable for download and printing):
.PUZ (suitable for use on tablets and computers with Across Lite app):
As always, you can check out all of our puzzles and solutions at our dedicated Charlotte Ledger Crossword page. (We’ll include the solution to this one in Monday’s newsletter)
This week in Charlotte: Fallout from possible Roe reversal; Queens to enter Division I sports; Dashew explains superintendent firing; Parks rank low, again
On Saturdays, The Ledger sifts through the local news of the week and links to the top articles — even if they appeared somewhere else. We’ll help you get caught up. That’s what Saturdays are for.
Politics
Effect of Roe v. Wade reversal in N.C.? With a Supreme Court leak signaling that abortion access could soon be up to individual states, there’s plenty of speculation about what might happen in North Carolina. Republican legislative leaders were mum about what they might do, and they probably don’t have the votes to override any veto by Democratic Gov. Roy Cooper. The issue could inject new fervor into this year’s elections, and the state could become a destination for abortions since it’s one of the few in the South where Republicans don’t control both the legislature and the governorship.
Cawthorn video: (CNBC) U.S. Rep. Madison Cawthorn said a newly released video that shows him naked in a bed atop another person is an example of “blackmail” and that he was merely “being crass with a friend, trying to be funny.” Cawthorn is a Republican running in a contested primary election in Western North Carolina.
Former mayor eyed for White House job: (Axios) President Biden is considering naming former Charlotte Mayor Anthony Foxx as the head of the White House Office of Public Engagement, according to unnamed sources cited by Axios. Foxx also served as Transportation Secretary under President Obama.
Education
Dashew explains superintendent firing: (WFAE) CMS board chair Elyse Dashew gave an interview to WFAE’s Ann Doss Helms, in which Dashew explained why the board fired Superintendent Earnest Winston. She said she and others selected Winston because of his integrity and passion and hoped he would grow into the job but that that didn’t happen: “I trusted and believed that he would develop those skills that were needed. And I think there were folks in the community who were watching us who weren’t trusting that. And they were right. I was wrong.”
Local news
Parks ranking: (Axios Charlotte) The non-profit Trust for Public Land ranked Charlotte’s parks system 83rd out of 100 U.S. cities in its most recent annual report, moving Charlotte up eight places since last year. A researcher said Charlotte moved up because of its greenways. But access to parks remains a challenge, with 37% of residents living within a 10-minute walk to a park.
City budget: (Biz Journal) The City of Charlotte released its $3.2B proposed budget Monday, which would raise street parking fees in uptown and South End from $1 per hour to $1.50 per hour and end free parking on Saturdays. There are also fee increases for trash pickup, water, sewer and storm water. The proposed budget includes pay raises for city employees, including police and fire department workers.
Business
Unions on the march: (Observer) A Starbucks in Boone voted to unionize, part of what might be a growing move toward organized labor in North Carolina — which has long been the second least-unionized state.
Two Duke buildings to be transformed: (Ledger 🔒) Duke Energy announced buyers of two of its uptown buildings. An office building on College Street will be knocked down for apartments, office space and hotel, and another on Church Street will be converted into apartments and will have an additional 12 stories for more apartments.
Sports
Nick Kelly out at Charlotte FC: (Biz Journal) Tepper Sports and Entertainment CEO Nick Kelly is stepping down after three months on the job, according to statements posted by the Carolina Panthers and the Charlotte FC. Kelly’s previous role was as president of Charlotte FC, and he assumed the Tepper Sports and Entertainment CEO role after Tom Glick abruptly left in February after 3 1/2 years as president.
Division I sports for Queens: Queens University of Charlotte has accepted an invitation to join the Division I ASUN Conference, formerly known as the Atlantic Sun Conference, the school said in a news release. The university’s sports teams will start transitioning to the league later this year. The 14-member conference includes Eastern Kentucky, Florida Gulf Coast and University of North Florida.
Good reads
The rise of corporate landlords: (Observer, subscriber-only) Corporate investors bought at least 40,000 single-family homes across North Carolina in the last 10 years and are renting them out, prompting worries that individuals are having a harder time buying homes. Building on the work of UNC Charlotte Urban Institute and of other media organizations, such as the Washington Post and New York Times, the series by the Observer and News & Observer is an ambitious, thoroughly reported and evenhanded contribution to understanding the issue.
Missing Chromebooks and iPads: (WCNC) Nearly $1.5M worth of technology issued by Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools has been reported lost or stolen in recent years, including more than 6,700 Chromebooks, 2,100 mobile hot spots and more than 1,200 iPads. Some have turned up at pawn shops. The numbers make up about 6% of all CMS-issued devices. District leaders pledge to do better in the future.
Clogger takes off on TikTok: (N.C. Rabbit Hole) A 27-year-old machine operator from Weaverville, north of Asheville, is becoming famous on TikTok, after someone filmed a video of his clogging dance moves and people on the internet started setting it to reggae and hip-hop tunes.
From the Ledger family of newsletters
Greenway battle: (Wednesday 🔒) Residents in the south Charlotte neighborhood of Park Crossing are fighting in court over whether the neighborhood should have access to the Little Sugar Creek Greenway. The dispute has been simmering for years, with some wanting paths to the greenway, while others worry about noise and traffic.
Set sail: (Friday 🔒) Non-boat-owners looking to enjoy a day out on Lake Norman or Lake Wylie have new options for renting boats by the day, with or without captains. New apps and websites have launched in recent years, some that are comparable to Airbnb.
Pay of Charlotte CEOs: (Monday) The Ledger crunched the numbers and assembled a list of the highest-paid CEOs of publicly traded Charlotte companies. At the top: Brian Moynihan of Bank of America, with $23.3M in compensation in 2021, followed by the CEOs of Honeywell, Lowe’s, Duke Energy and Driven Brands.
Guide to voter guides: (Monday) The primary election is May 17, and early voting has started. We reviewed several local voter guides and have suggestions of how to get the critical information you need to be an informed voter — even in low-profile races.
Not a baaad idea: (Wednesday 🔒) The city of Belmont in Gaston County is renting 20 goats from a South Carolina company to chew kudzu and underbrush from an 18-acre area where the city wants to build a greenway. The goats are protected by an electric fence, and the city has created a webpage that tells the goats’ name and describes their personalities.
Big house: (Friday 🔒) A 23,000 s.f. estate in Waxhaw hit the market Thursday for $5.6M. The home on Bonds Grove Church Road was built in the mid-1990s by an Amway executive, and it includes two pools, a 15-seat home theater, a giant dining room and a 4,000 s.f. guest house on the property.
Food and family: (Ways of Life 🔒) Lisa Cone-Aragona died suddenly of an unexplained illness at age 52 last month, and her family remembers her as a caterer who loved feeding people and a woman who delighted in having her parents living right next door.
CATS ridership slowly rising: (Transit Time) Ridership of light rail and express buses is up over a year ago, but the number of people riding local buses is flat — even as workers return to the office.
Charlotte FC bulks up talent: (Fútbol Friday) Charlotte FC signed two new players ahead of this week’s transfer deadline — including one who does a backflip when he scores goals. The team’s coach, who said “we’re screwed” because he lacked players when the season began, now has more offensive weapons.
Sports gambling in Kings Mountain: (Monday) In our occasional series answering readers’ development questions, we learned that the Catawba Two Kings Casino in Kings Mountain plans to open a sports book this spring.
BofA boss pressed on abortion: (Friday 🔒) Hosts of “CBS Morning” pressed Bank of America CEO Brian Moynihan on what the bank will do if Roe v. Wade is overturned.
Charlotte expansion: (Friday 🔒) The new CEO of communications firm Chernoff Newman says the company plans to expand in Charlotte, as the industry undergoes many changes.
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Executive editor: Tony Mecia; Managing editor: Cristina Bolling; Contributing editor: Tim Whitmire, CXN Advisory; Contributing photographer/videographer: Kevin Young, The 5 and 2 Project