Surviving the jargon jungle

Plus: The news of the week — Record turnout across NC for early voting; Home sales continue to decline; Hornets announce new practice facility; Some mountain towns beg visitors to return

Oct 19, 2024

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Navigating corporate speak: My battle against buzzwords and bureaucracy

Does your workplace use words like “synergy,” “level set” and “actionable”? If so, you might be a victim of language abuse, according to writer Page Leggett.

by Page Leggett

I once worked in the training department of a global financial institution. But instead of being called “the training department,” the group was cryptically known as “Enterprise Learning.” People used to ask if I ever ran into Captain Kirk or Mr. Spock at work.

Prior to joining this corporate behemoth, I’d worked for PR agencies my whole career. Our goal was to write and speak clearly.

So, I was unprepared for the language abuse I encountered once I became part of Cubicle Nation. Our company had as many words for “meetings” as the Inuit have for “snow.” There were deep dives, town halls, pulse checks, touch bases, All Hands and offsites (which were mostly held — ironically — onsite).

Often, someone would begin a meeting by saying they had a “hard stop.”

Assignments were “deliverables.” Urgent tasks — which were usually urgent because the boss had forgotten about them until the 11th hour — were “fire drills.”

People used “drinking the Kool-Aid” as if it were positive. (I told a few people that the origin of the phrase was the decidedly not positive Jonestown massacre, in which nearly 1,000 members of the Peoples Temple cult lost their lives after drinking a concoction of cyanide and a powdered drink mix. They kept right on saying it.)

I was once asked to produce a “four blocker” by “EOD.” I said I’d get right on it — as soon as the requestor explained what a four blocker was. (It’s a PowerPoint slide divided into quadrants.)

Another boss asked me for a “role clarity matrix.” I can’t even.

There was an ongoing debate at this company I knew about through a friend in the Corporate Communications department. The muckety-mucks couldn’t decide what to call the minions.

Some worried “employees” wasn’t personal enough and wanted us to be “associates” instead. Four blockers comparing the virtues of “associates” vs. “employees” were produced and discussed. During deep dives, of course.

How naïve I was to think I could move the dial just by telling folks that “learnings” wasn’t a word — but that “lessons” was. Or that hearing them say “decisioning” was like nails on a chalkboard. (Who “decisioned” that “decided” wasn’t good enough, anyway? I suspect a highly paid consultant used it to try to sound intelligent. And everyone blindly adopted the malaprop — or “drank the Kool-Aid,” if you prefer.)

Even intelligent, educated people would parrot the made-up words and corporate jargon they heard higher-ups use. I made it my mission to point out — and try to stamp out — jargon whenever I heard or saw it.

But it was hopeless. You can’t boil the ocean, as they say.

My Enterprise Learning teammates spoke of “learning solutions.” Early in my tenure, I asked a colleague, “Do you mean ‘classes’?”

She was stumped but said she’d reach out (another term I came to loathe) to her manager.

She circled back after running it up the flagpole to say “learning solutions” was the best-in-class term. And that was that.

I suggested that “learning solutions” was clunky. And worse, it was unclear. Opting for a simpler term — classes, training, workshops — seemed like, to use the corporate parlance, low-hanging fruit.

But I was never going to get buy-in.

Meaningless jargon and confusing acronyms had been baked in (another favored phrase) to the corporate culture.

For years, William Zinsser’s “On Writing Well” has been a go-to writing resource. I took my well-loved copy to work, but Zinsser’s good advice wasn’t appreciated by many. “Clutter is the disease of American writing,” he writes in one of my favorite passages. “We are a society strangling in unnecessary words, circular constructions, pompous frills and meaningless jargon.”

Jargon, I discovered during my corporate days, actually does serve a purpose — although I think it’s a nefarious one. It separates the insiders from the outsiders. (“If you have to ask what a four blocker is, you’re not one of us.”)

Language can enlighten or confuse. It can be inclusive or intentionally leave people out. You’d think that people intent on “breaking down silos” would want to use language easily understood by all. But speaking in plain English isn’t in everyone’s wheelhouse.

When I was learning new vocabulary words in elementary school, I used to love using my fancy words with my parents in front of my little sister. “Moooooom, Blake’s being a ruffian and causing me consternation.” My sister had no idea what I was saying.

Much of the time I worked at Jargon National, I didn’t know what the people around me were saying, either. But they were speaking a language I didn’t care to learn.

Page Leggett is a Charlotte-based freelance writer. Her deliverables include deep-dive articles about arts and culture, healthcare and travel. Reach out to touch base with her at epageleggett@gmail.com.

🗣️ What’s your biggest corporate jargon pet-peeve? If you’ve got the bandwidth, think outside the box and connect with us on the topic. We might circle back with your responses in a future edition of The Ledger.

Tell us your biggest jargon pet peeve

This week in Charlotte: Early voting kicks off; Charlotte Latin students upset over new phone rules; Toll lanes advance; Some mountain towns are ready for tourists

On Saturdays, The Ledger sifts through the local news of the week and links to the top articles — even if they appeared somewhere else. We’ll help you get caught up. That’s what Saturdays are for.

Education

No-phone rules: (Ledger 🔒) Students at Charlotte Latin School have started a petition to protest a new cell phone policy that requires them to lock up their phones for the entire school day. The policy, which takes effect next week, is one of the strictest no-phone policies at Charlotte-area schools. Students will be issued Yondr pouches, phone-sized sleeves with magnetic locking mechanisms that can be unlocked with a special device. Violators will have their phones confiscated and returned at the end of the day.
Application fees waived: (CFNC) Many North Carolina colleges are waiving their application fees for students who apply between Oct. 21-27 through the College Foundation of North Carolina Application Hub.

Politics

Early voting starts strong: (WRAL) More than 350,000 voters in North Carolina turned out to cast votes during the first day of early voting — a record number for the state. Crowds of people waited in lines on Thursday and Friday to cast their ballots. Early voting ends Nov. 2.
Robinson files defamation suit: (WFAE) Lt. Gov. Mark Robinson filed a defamation lawsuit against CNN, which last month linked Robinson to inflammatory comments in a porn site chat room. Robinson denied the accusations and said it was a “high-tech lynching” and that the article relied on unverified information. Robinson, a Republican, is running for governor against Democratic attorney general Josh Stein.

Local news

Train service suspended: (CATS) The Charlotte Area Transit System is suspending all Blue Line and Gold Line rail service today through Monday at 5 a.m. for preventative maintenance. CATS will offer what’s called a bus bridge during that time, which is comprised of buses that pick up and drop off along the rail route to transport riders while the rail is not in use.
Toll lanes advance: (WFAE) The North Carolina Department of Transportation has been given the green light by a regional transportation planning organization to partner with a private company to build express toll lanes on I-77 in south Charlotte. The toll lanes are expected to cost $3.7B, with the private company setting the toll rates and keeping the profits. Despite opposition from several municipalities, the plan was mostly backed by the city of Charlotte, Pineville, Mint Hill, Mooresville, and Union County.

Business

Home sales continue to decline: (Ledger🔒)The Charlotte region’s housing market has not yet been ignited by the Federal Reserve’s recent rate cut, as the number of closings in Mecklenburg County fell by nearly 9% compared with a year earlier. However, the number of houses under contract rose 12%, and new listings also rose 12%, which should translate to more closings in the coming months.
Bougie Balenciaga opens in SouthPark: (Biz Journal) Luxury Paris-based retailer Balenciaga opened a nearly 4,000 s.f. store in SouthPark on Friday, its first in North Carolina. Socks go for $125 and a leather bomber costs $8,790.

Sports

New practice facility: (Axios Charlotte, with renderings) The Charlotte Hornets plan to break ground on a new 160,000 s.f. practice facility in early 2025, which is expected to open in time for the 2026-2027 NBA season.
New Hornets announcer: (WBTV) The Charlotte Hornets have announced Shawn Parker as their new public address announcer, replacing the late Patrick "Big Pat" Doughty. Parker has previously announced for the Minnesota Timberwolves and universities, and has experience as a game show host. The Hornets are planning to honor Doughty's legacy as the new season gets underway.
Hot new name: (Gaston Gazette) Gastonia’s professional baseball club adopted the name “Ghost Peppers.” Some 4,000 people voted on options including Bolognia, Galactic Dinos, Garden Gnomes, Gastronauts, Yarniaks and Zombees.

From the Ledger family of newsletters

Monday

Teams compete in the Build Your Own Boat contest at the U.S. National Whitewater Center; Charlotte City Council to debate adding toll lanes on I-77 south of uptown and historic landmark designation for Steele Creek Presbyterian Church; Former Charlotte Observer columnist and celebrated poet Dannye Romine Powell passed away at age 83.

Wednesday

Town of Pineville leaders are considering selling the historic former Cone Mills site to a developer who would build housing and retail.
Plus: Almost all uptown hotel rooms are sold out the night of the Concert for the Carolinas benefit concert; A very micro IKEA opens.

Friday

Some mountain communities are pleading for tourists to return, saying they have the capacity to return to normal operations and need the economic boost in what is usually their busy fall season.
Plus: UNC Charlotte is becoming one of 4 top-tier research universities in NC; We answer a reader question about bulldozing near a south Charlotte middle school.

Mountain Updates

Sunday: Mountain businesses seek to recover; Water starts to flow through Asheville pipes; Large stretch of Blue Ridge Parkway reopens in Virginia; School leaders grapple with plans to reopen.

Monday: Witnessing the uneven flood damage while driving west from Charlotte through towns like Saluda, Henderson and Brevard; Temperatures set to drop in Western North Carolina; Elderly and disabled residents face significant challenges; Christmas tree farmers feel stress; Asheville artists salvage damaged art to create a deck of cards.

Tuesday: How Western North Carolina breweries jumped into the action to help with recovery; Hendersonville’s water is drinkable again; Man charged with making threats against FEMA worker; Black Mountain youth are invited to attend the Panthers game.

Wednesday: Sudden cold temperatures and snow in the mountains brings hardship; Appalachian State University students return to class; More big names added to the Concert for Carolina lineup; The home of American novelist Thomas Wolfe was severely damaged when a tree toppled against the house.

Friday: Water troubles are likely to persist; NCDOT is looking for creative options to rebuild I-40; Governor raises unemployment benefits; Reports on uptick of stinging and biting insects.

Election Hub

The Ledger launched its Election Hub, which provides fair, balanced information about more than 200 candidates and races in the five-county Charlotte region. It’s free and easy to use — check it out!

Ways of Life🔒

Charlotte writer Ken Garfield shares poignant insights he's gleaned during his brother’s battle with pancreatic cancer, which has taken his brother through chemotherapy, surgery, and now a period of uncertainty. They include: Enjoy small blessings. Find value in doing what needs to be done. Savor those last conversations and small moments that will be with you for the rest of your life.

Transit Time

The U.S. Census Bureau’s latest American Community Survey reveals that Charlotte has the second-highest share of people working from home in the United States, with 29.7% of survey respondents reporting working from home in 2023. This high rate of work-from-home has led to a struggling uptown office market and a proposed multibillion-dollar transportation plan that depends on a one-cent sales tax increase.

Fútbol Friday

Charlotte FC has secured a spot in the MLS playoffs and a bye into Round One, with only their opponent yet to be determined. Coach Dean Smith has no preference on which team they face, while D.C. United is among four teams fighting for the last two playoff spots. Charlotte's focus is on maintaining momentum on both offense and defense to prepare for a deep playoff run.

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Executive editor: Tony Mecia; Managing editor: Cristina Bolling; Staff writer: Lindsey Banks; Business manager: Brie Chrisman